Beloved
by 1tskillingm3
Summary: Kuroo would have hated the Black Order even if he wasn't a Noah. He would have resented the Innocence even if his blood didn't naturally sing with the need to destroy it. Because they were responsible for taking away his most precious person. (Or that DGM au that no one asked for)


"Akaashi! Akaashi, please, you've got to help me! You've got to save him!" Kuroo burst in and started to try to drag the Noah of Dreams out the door. Akaashi, who had been enjoying a quiet book, frowned at the Noah of Pleasure and stubbornly dug his heals into the carpet.

"Akaashi, _please_ -!"

"Hold up, where are we going?" asked Akaashi sternly.

"To the Black Order's HQ." Kuroo said distractedly as if it was obvious.

" _Why?_ "

"Because we've got to save Kenma and you're the only one who can. Now come on-" Said Kuroo looking harassed.

"Wait. Kenma? As in, Kozume Kenma? That exorcist that's been on the Earl's kill list for a while now?" said Akaashi flatly.

"That doesn't matter-!"

"On the contrary, I think most people would agree that it matters quite a bit." Said Akaashi coolly fixing Kuroo's wild gold eyes with his own.

"You don't understand." Whispered Kuroo looking away from him. Akaashi blinked, he'd never seen Kuroo quite this undone. It was quite out of character.

"No. I don't understand." Agreed Akaashi, "Which means you've got some explaining to do before we go anywhere."

"It's all my fault. I fucked up big time." Began Kuroo softly after a long pause, "You see, we were childhood friends."

When Kuroo first heard about the tailor's freak kid, he was just as sickly curious as all the others in their small. Just a snip-bit of a rumor and he was hooked. Unlike the rest of his peers though Kuroo was much better at gathering information and he immediately skipped off to what he considered the best source of up-to-date gossip. The bakery was bustling as usual with ladies of all different classes as they waited in line for their bread and swapped tales and woes. Kuroo, who his mother liked to accuse him of being too charming for his own good, squeezed through the mass of skirts to the front and flashed the bakers wife his most award winning smile. As usual she cooed over how cute he was, pinched his cheek, and offered him a piece of apple pie. With a little bow that made the ladies in the room giggle and sigh over what a heartbreaker he'd be when he grew up, Kuroo took his treat to the corner of the room and perched on the stool there.

And so his work began as he sorted through all the mindless babble for anything useful.

" _Did you see what Mrs. Williams let her daughter wear last Sunday? I swear, some people have no shame-"_

 _"-an't take this heat! If I have to suffer through one more day of this infernal summer I feel like I'll-"_

 _"-But Joey is already growing so much! I've had to let out the hemming of his pants twice in the last month. Twice!"_

 _"_ I saw the Kozume's son lurking behind the toy shop again today. I am telling you Martha, there is something wrong with that child."

Kuroo perked up and listened more closely to the pair of women standing near the door.

"Well, it's expected that they'd be a little off. After all, they are _foreign._ " The other woman sniffed, as if her family hadn't emigrated from Eastern Europe years earlier.

"It's more than that. The parents seem fine, but that boy… there's something unnatural about him."

"He's a bit odd, I'll grant you that… always skulking around in the shadows staring at people from that horrid long hair of his."

"Now I am not saying this is true… but there's talk of strange things happening around him. Stuff moving when no one's touched it and the like. And I am not pointing any fingers or anything, but there has been almost 15 deaths in the area since they moved here."

"Oh hush! Don't go saying scary things like that right before I have to walk home alone!"

"Oh? Your husband hitting the drink again? You know you really should-"

After that, Kuroo lost interest in their conversation. He'd heard what he wanted to, for now anyway. Wrapping the pie in his handkerchief he tucked it in his pocket for later and trotted down the street. Just a snip bit of info, of a rumor, and Kuroo found he was even more interested rather than less. Trotting down the road, it didn't take long before Kuroo was picking his way around behind the toy shop. He positively grinned when he spotted the small dark-haired Japanese kid leaning over a broken chess board, idly pushing around the pieces. Like the ladies in the bakery had mentioned, his hair was quite long for a boy(reaching past his chin! Kuroo marveled) but as the other boy leaned over slightly his hair parted in the back and revealed a green crystal embedded in the back of his neck.

Kuroo's grin widened. This kid kept getting even more interesting.

"So." Said Kuroo plopping on the other side of the chess board without ceremony, making the kid jump in freight, "Who's winning? You, or you?"

"Who are you?" asked the other, ignoring his question, and blinking at him with startled wide golden eyes. Huh, thought Kuroo, pretty.

"Tetsuro Kuroo, though most people call me Kuroo. I am 8 years old and I live just down the street from here. Now your turn! I know your last name is Kozume, what's your first name?" said Kuroo giving his most charming smile. The other boy looked rather alarmed.

"…Kenma." The boy said, his eyes flicking everywhere except Kuroo's face.

"And how old are you?" Kuroo tried to prompt.

"7." Replied Kenma so quietly Kuroo almost couldn't hear.

"Cool! We're almost the same age." said Kuroo shifting a little bit across the board into the other's personal space. Kenma leaned away from him, then paused as he sniffed the air curiously, "Oh, right! I almost forgot!"

Kenma gave him a bewildered look, but made no comment as Kuroo shifted back on his heals and dug in his coat pocket. Kuroo was learning quickly that this kid wasn't much of a talker. He found he didn't mind in the least.

"Here! Do you like apple pie? I know it's bit squished, but it should still taste delicious." Said Kuroo offering the other boy the handkerchief wrapped treat.

"But… isn't that yours?" asked Kenma hesitantly making no move to take it, though Kuroo noticed that his eyes remained fixed of the pie the moment Kuroo brought it out.

"Oh course it's mine, that's why I am offering it to you. I can get more from the bakery for free any time I want." Said Kuroo shoving it into the other boy's hands.

"Thanks…" mumbled Kenma as he reverently unwrapped the crushed thing and took a bite. His expression didn't technically change, but Kuroo could have sworn those gold eye sparkled.

"No problem, what are friends for?"

***6 years later***

Kuroo was just about to go to bed when he noticed Kenma hovering nervously at the gate to his house. Mind swirling with confusion, Kuroo quickly snuck past his parents room and down the stairs to let him in. It wasn't that they'd never had impromptu sleep-overs in the middle of the night- they did, a lot actually- but it was always Kuroo who initiated. He couldn't help but worry that there was something very wrong.

As usual, Kenma didn't come right out and say what was wrong immediately. Outwardly, he looked the same as he had all years that Kuroo had known him. Clothes lose and plain, dark hair partially hiding his face… that Kuroo knew from experience probably had an expression that was somewhere in-between apathy and anxiousness. Kuroo wanted to draw the other boy in close and embrace him, but he knew that if Kenma really were anxious enough to come unannounced to his house in the middle of the night he probably would appreciate the little extra personal space. So instead Kuroo wordlessly led his friend to the kitchen and got out a slice of apple pie and slid it across the table to him.

"Thanks Kuroo…" Kenma murmured, and there was that special light to his gaze that Kuroo found himself often bending over backwards to make appear.

"What are friends for?" Kuroo said as he always did, if it came out as a bit more of a sensual purr than usual it was probably because he was a bit tired and wasn't quite able to rein in his inner flirt. This time though, instead of giving him a deadpan expression like he was the biggest idiot, Kenma simply gave him a soft smile that Kuroo tried to imprint in his mind so he could treasure it always. Then the apple pie stole his attention again. Kuroo didn't really mind. Kenma-watching was Kuroo's favorite hobby, and Kenma-watching when the other boy was doing something that made him happy(like eating apple pie, or solving a new puzzle from the toy store) held a special place in Kuroo's heart.

Just as people had once teased him when he was younger, Kuroo found himself to be quite the heartthrob among the girls in the village. He was a bit of a flirt and he knew it. He took great pleasure in the playful dance and teasing banter that came with charming the hearts of young ladies. Even though he was only 13, his mother was already nagging him about who he might want to court in a few years. However… whenever he thought about it, whenever he tried to picture holding another person, loving them, marrying them and spending the rest of his life with them… all he could think of was gold eyes and how much he liked how soft Kenma's hair was and the way his heart seemed fill with contentment whenever he was close by. He let his eyes trail over the fine lines of his friends features, found himself fascinated by the slight shifting of muscles under skin, felt himself drawn by strange things like the hollow of Kenma's collarbone or the grace in his long fingers. It was a little jolting to realize that the only person he had interest in courting was his best friend. Even more when he thought about how much such a relationship would be frowned upon in their conservative village. Kuroo wouldn't care about whatever shit people would think of them, but he knew that Kenma would. People's cruel gazes and whispers… it would tear at his friend from the inside out.

"Kuroo…?" asked Kenma softly as he brought his dirty plate to the wash basin.

"Hmm?" hummed Kuroo, at once giving him his full attention.

"Could I… stay here tonight?" asked Kenma tentatively.

"Always." Blinked Kuroo. As if he'd ever been able to deny Kenma. As if he'd ever want to. Kenma knew that. Neither of them usually bothered to ask anymore. Something was very off. He'd never seen his friend act like this and it was worrying him. Kuroo grew even more concerned when once they'd climbed into bed Kenma curled up against him like a cat instead of laying as far away from him as possible on the bed as usual. He wanted to relish the rare moment, but now he was really worried.

"Kenma…" Kuroo began uncertainly. He wanted the younger boy to tell him whatever was up when he was ready, but the longer this went on the more it seemed like it was important.

"Do you remember the black clergyman that came into town yesterday?" interrupted Kenma.

"Yeah? They came to get rid of those monsters that have been killing loads of people lately, right?" asked Kuroo raising his eyebrow, unsure what this had to do with anything. He tried to see Kenma's expression for a hint, but he burrowed his face further into the crook of his neck, "Kenma, what is it?"

"That's not the only thing they came for…" came Kenma's muffled reply.

"What… what do you mean?" asked Kuroo a feeling of dread settling on him making him tighten his hold on his friend.

"They've been asking questions around town apparently… It seems that they're looking for this." Kenma stated taking Kuroo's hand and letting it rest just over where Kuroo knew the odd crystal that was embedded in his neck lay. Kuroo swallowed, he wasn't touching it, but his skin prickled like he was developing a rash. He knew that if he touched it directly that it would burn him. Neither of them could figure out why he reacted this way, since anyone else who seemed to accidentally touch it said that it left a tingly pleasant feeling. The crystal was weird and it gave Kuroo a gross feeling in the pit of his stomach and his scalp throb painfully whenever he thought too much about it… not to mention all the weird things that sometimes happened because of it…

"…What will they do once they find out you have it?" asked Kuroo, though he dreaded the answer.

"…Father said they'd want me for the Holly War." Kenma said softly. Something clenched painfully in his gut, 'nonononono this couldn't be happening, it was just another one of those weird dreams he'd been getting lately.'

"And if you don't want to fight?" Kuroo somehow managed to ask despite the fact that it sort of felt like his world was ending.

"…It doesn't sound like it's optional." Kenma replied, confirming Kuroo's fears. He squeezed his eyes closed and buried his nose in Kenma's hair trying to calm the wild feelings rising within him.

"How long do you think we have?" he asked.

"I don't know." Said Kenma burrowing closer, "I left by the back of the house when I saw them knocking at the front door… but I don't think it will take anyone long to figure out that I am here."

"Then let's run for it." Kuroo said suddenly sitting up, "Right now. Let's grab some stuff and just go for it."

"But-" began Kenma a thousand objections clearly in his eyes.

"Do you want to fight in this war?" demanded Kuroo. His skin felt feverish and his forehead ached for some reason be he ignored it. Kenma's lips parted with an odd expression as he stared at Kuroo's eyes.

"…No. No, I don't want to fight anyone." Kenma said finally.

"Then let's go. I won't let anyone just take you away." Kuroo said fervently. Kenma nodded slowly and the two of them began throwing things in a bag.

They grabbed the basics from the kitchen and then snuck out. The streets where eerily empty and dark as they hurried along, the shadows looking larger than usual and every sound seeming deafening in the stillness. Kuroo reached out and took hold of Kenma's hand and led him down the street towards the edge of the village.

They almost made it too.

Just before they got to the edge of the woods Kuroo saw something move out of the corner of his eye. Before he could react, something hit him in the side ripping him away from Kenma and knocking him to the ground opening a shallow cut on his side from the point of contact. It shouldn't have hurt him that badly but- he wasn't even really injured, it was literally just a scratch, but- agony wracked through his body. It hurt so badly he couldn't even scream.

 _'Innocence_ ' something in his mind supplied with a hiss.

His vision swam but he vaguely registered that Kenma had stepped between him and the Black Clergyman and was speaking to them softly.

"…asked him to. He didn't do anything wrong." Kenma was saying.

"He tried to make off with invaluable property of the Church." Growled one of them. Kuroo wanted to kill them. He'd never been a particularly violent person, generally pretty patient and laid back actually, but right at this moment there was a strange murderous rage running wild in his blood.

"He didn't know. He's not involved in this." Kenma said firmly, it was the most Kuroo had ever heard him speak to a complete stranger. He'd be proud if he wasn't o pissed, "You said all you wanted was for me to come with you…. So leave him out of this."

"We did, and you tried to run away. You best not try anymore than that or you may become a fallen disciple." Said the burly clergy grabbing Kenma by his upper arm and beginning to drag him away.

"Wait. My friend, he's hurt." Kuroo heard Kenma try to say as they pulled him away. Kuroo tried to raise himself, tried to speak, but he couldn't seem to. Something seemed to be rolling under his skin. Something was changing. But that didn't matter because right now these people were taking away his best friend. All because of some stupid rock that he'd been born with in his neck.

 _Never forgive…_ a voice within him snarled. His thoughts were getting hazier by the second, his vision flickering between what was happening right in front of him and flashes of old battle fields and names and places he'd never heard of before.

"He'll be fine, I didn't hit him that hard." The clergy were saying.

"No, no, something is wrong." That was Kenma speaking. That was Kenma sounding upset and distressed. And these people were at fault.

 _Never forgive…_

"There are a ton of Akuma converging on this cite. We need to get you to the Order as soon as possible. If we don't hurry, than your whole village will get caught up in this." Their voices were getting fainter and fainter but Kuroo didn't know if that was because they were leaving or he was that close to passing out. The memories were coming faster now, beginning to overwhelm him. His forehead felt like it was splitting open. He clutched at it and found wounds like stars spread across it. He squinted through the pain but the street before him was empty. They'd already taken him.

 _Never forgive…_

"Kenma…" he choked out. A heart like door seemed to emerge out of nothing and a fat clown-like man bounced out of it toward him.

 _Never forgive… the Innocence._

"Happy Birthday Joyed~❤"

***8 years later***

Kuroo could barely breathe looking at the sight before him. He'd been irrationally relieved when he'd seen _Kozume Kenma_ on the Earl's kill list because- although it was bad news for the future- it meant that somehow, despite exorcists early death rate, his friend was still alive. Seeing him now though… Kuroo almost hadn't recognized him at first. He was dressed in the black and silver uniform of the Order and his hair was golden now. Well, mostly golden. The top of his head near the roots was still his natural hair color and Kuroo found it strangely comforting despite how odd it looked. He was still Kenma under whatever roll the Black Order wanted him to fill. He was still his best friend staring at him with calm golden eyes as his fingers played with a small wooden puzzle.

"Kuroo." Kenma greeted him, as if they'd never spent a day apart. As if seeing him now with ash colored skin and his stigma clearly visible on his forehead was completely normal. As it he weren't an exorcist and Kuroo not a Noah. He didn't even look surprised. He'd probably worked it out ahead of time.

"Kenma…" Kuroo licked his lips nervously and stepped closer, "Aren't you a bit relaxed considering… everything?"

"Hmmm… not really. They don't need me at the fight at the river and my skills are not particularly suited to such situations anyway. And Akuma are unlikely to come up here without reason." Said Kenma simply shrugging and going back to his puzzle.

"They would if I called them." Commented Kuroo ducking into his personal space. Kenma didn't seem particularly bothered, merely tilting his head and observing him through his hair.

"But you won't." he said with absolute certainty.

"Oh ho? That's awfully trusting of you considering I am your enemy." Commented Kuroo a little bit bitterly.

"You are Kuroo." Shrugged Kenma as if that was enough of an explanation for his foolish trust. Kuroo glowered at him not liking the way he was making him feel. Moving swiftly, he thrust his hand into the blond exorcist's chest, fingers moving harmlessly through skin and bone so he could curl his hand around Kenma's heart.

"That's horribly naïve of you Kenma. Don't you know who I am now? Don't you know what I _do?_ It's my job to _kill_ you." Kuroo said softly letting his hand flex around the organ in his palm, "I could rip out your heart right now and you wouldn't even have time to activate your Innocence."

"Kuroo," said Kenma clearly, his gaze abnormally steady, "I am not planning to activate my Innocence."

"…what the hell Kenma? Do you have a death wish?" Kuroo released a stressed breath withdrawing his hand. And damn it all Kenma's heart had remained calm and unflustered that all whole time. How was it even possible that he trusted Kuroo that much? Even Kuroo didn't trust himself that much. Kenma had literally put his life into his hands with out any sort of defense or protection and said he believed Kuroo wouldn't hurt him despite all the perfectly valid reasons that said that was exactly what was going to happen and what the fuck was Kuroo even supposed to _do_ with that kind of trust?

Kuroo stared at the young man before him and was reminded once again how hopelessly, and irrationally, and completely he loved him. How much he had missed him. How much time he'd spent distraught because he was sure Kenma would wind up killed before Kuroo found him again. And it shouldn't have been so surprising that Kenma was right as usual. Kuroo had never known him to be wrong before. Yet it still seemed to blindside him that no matter how much he was supposed to, he was not going to be able to kill this person who was meant to be his enemy.

"Kenma…" breathed Kuroo letting his eyes flutter shut as he rested his forehead against his childhood friend's, "Come back with me. Leave the Order."

"…that's not going to work." Mumbled Kenma.

"Why not? We can just go. The Order is not strong enough to take you back if I have you under my protection." Insisted Kuroo, "I can talk to the Earl, we can figure something out."

"Kuroo… that's _not_ going to work." Repeated Kenma, though his fingers curled to entwine their hands in the space between them.

" _Why_?" demanded Kuroo. Hell if he was going to let Kenma go now, he'd just got him back, he wasn't going to lose him to the Order twice-

"This." Said Kenma simply by way of explanation pulling Kuroo's hand up just like he had all those years ago to rest over the Innocence in his neck. Kuroo's face twisted at once in understanding at what Kenma was getting at. _Fucking Innocence_. Once again it was all that stupid stuffs fault. If Kuroo brought Kenma back with him, there was no way that the Earl or any of the other Noah would let him live if he carried Innocence around them. They all despised the stuff as much a Kuroo did. And even if- by some miracle- his family did except the young exorcist, the Innocence he bore would immediately turn on him if he joined the Earl. Kuroo had seem fallen disciples before… there was no way he could do that to Kenma.

 _Never forgive the Innocence._

"Then we'll just have to destroy it so that it can't hurt you anymore." Growled Kuroo letting his fingers phase through his best friends skin to grasp the crystal… it should be fine. He wasn't going to be harming Kenma, just this unnatural, harmful, despicable thing that fed on his friend's energy and continued to ruin their lives.

"Kuroo no, I can't-!" Kenma began looking alarmed for the first time that night. But Kuroo's fist had already closed around the stone, the Noah inside him roaring in delight as he felt the Innocence shatter in his grip.

Kuroo would forever be haunted by the way Kenma screamed.

***Present***

"Wow… I am almost impressed. I haven't seen anyone fuck up that colossally in a while." Commented Akaashi shaking his head.

"I didn't mean to, I didn't think it was going to hurt him." Whispered Kuroo practically pulling out his hair, "I just wanted the Innocence gone… I didn't realize it was so tightly attached to his central nervous system or that his life force had become twined with it."

"So? What happened? You wouldn't be here if he'd died, you'd be with the Earl." Commented Akaashi sighing, because _really_ what was he supposed to do with a Noah that was so tightly committed to an _Exorcist_ of all things?

"No, the- his Innocence healed and stabilized his physical body but… the doctors at the Order said he's in a coma and that- and that there's a chance that he might never wake up-"

"Alright, alright, I get it." Sighed Akaashi. What a hassle; after all that, the love struck Noah hadn't even managed to properly destroy the boy's Innocence.

"Will you help me?" Kuroo begged, he was so distraught that it was actually distressing Akaashi as well, "I know you've been avoiding the Order since that run-in you had with General Bokuto but-"

"Kuroo." Interrupted Akaashi, "How many life-times have you and I shared together?"

"More than I can remember." Admitted Kuroo.

"And in every life and form we've been re-born into we have always been precious to one another. I am not going to let you suffer because of this, Exorcists or no Exorcists." Frowned Akaashi.

" _Thank you_." Kuroo said, his sly and charming features now only showing only earnestness.

"…C'mon, let's go wake your sleeping beauty before I think better of it." Sighed Akaashi opening up a door that would take them right to the Order.

Kenma came to consciousness with a comforting sweet scent at the edges of his senses. His eyes slowly fluttered open to an empty hospital room before settling on a steaming piece of apple pie sitting one his bedside table. The corner of Kenma's mouth tugged slightly upward. His eyes shone.


End file.
